Ask Dr. Hin?

Q: What is benzodiazepine ? How many benzodiazepine compounds do you normally take before you go to bed? What is an anxiolytic? What diagnosis recommends prescribing an amnestic? Can you moon dance when you are on a lot of skeletal muscle relaxants? Does the combination of anti-arrhythmic and rhythmic drugs add up to some kind of supa-rhythmic stop I mean what's that rhythmic thang going on?

A: Benzodiazepine drugs have variable sedative, hypnotic (sleep-inducing), anxiolytic (anti-anxiety), anticonvulsant, muscle relaxant and amnesic resultings that can be treating anxieties, insomnias, agitations, seizures, muscle spasms, and alcohol withdrawals. Benzodiazepines depress the central nervous system by enhancing the effects of gamma-aminobutyric acid (GABA), a neural inhibitor.

Q: So how many substances can you recommend for me?

A: I'm sure we can come up with something.

Down memory lane

Lew Ayres played Dr. Kildare in nine MGM movies1 before attempting to enlist as a member of the Medical Corps. When the military would not guarantee him a slot, he declared himself a conscientious objector. The Pentagon decided that was bad ink and let him in the medics. He served in New Guinea in the Pacific theater.

• 1Young Dr. Kildare (1938)
• Calling Dr. Kildare (1939)
• The Secret of Dr. Kildare (1939)
• Dr. Kildare's Strange Case (1940)
• Dr. Kildare Goes Home (1940)
• Dr. Kildare's Crisis (1940)
• The People vs. Dr. Kildare (1941)
• Dr. Kildare's Wedding Day (1941)
• Dr. Kildare's Victory (1942)
  

What Michael Jackson's doc had him on

Propofolm: a short-acting, intravenously administered hypnotic agent.

Three benzodiazepine derivatives:

Lorazepam: an anxiolytic, amnestic, sedative, hypnotic, anti-convulsant and muscle relaxant.
Midazolam: an ultra short-acting potent anxiolytic, amnestic, hypnotic, anticonvulsant, skeletal muscle relaxant and sedative.
Diazepam: an anxiolytic, anticonvulsant, hypnotic, sedative, skeletal muscle relaxant, and amnestic.

Lidocaine: a common local anesthetic and anti-arrhythmic drug.
Ephedrine: a sympathomimetic that acts as a stimulant, appetite suppressant, concentration aid, decongestant, and to treat hypotension associated with anaesthesia.

Free to choose

Under the fabulous current system, you always get to choose your own doctor. Choose one:

Dr. Conrad Murray
Dr. Zachary Smith
Dr. Yuri Zhivago
Dr. Marcus Welby
Dr. Strangelove
Dr. Julius No
Dr. Julius Erving
Dr. Benjamin Katz
Dr. Tommy Chong
Dr. Dre

Take this simple, at-home test.

A bewildering array of choices.

Other treatment options recommended by a licensed therapist

Odds, ends, and last resorts.

Urgent gorilla update

A Capitol Hill policy manu- facturer alerts us to developments in the British gorilla community.

Bobby: In Memoriam.

French sexy 1940s
French sexy 1960s
French sexy 1980s
French sexy today

Let's get one thing straight

Robert Armstrong playing Carl Denham as a barely disguised Merian C. Cooper (1933 King Kong, part 11 -- at 6:53) tries to put the rap on Fay Wray, as if she ever did anything as stoopid or malicious as drag a rare animal to New York City to shake it in front of the theater crowd for a couple of bucks.

So, no, Bob or Carl or Merian. It wasn't Beauty, damn it, it was the motion picture industry in collaboration with the U.S. Army Air Corps that killed King Kong. They barely beat him with the best of their men and machines, all pinned themselves with a bunch of medals, and blamed the whole mess on a woman.

Mission accomplished.

Urgent alert

I saw Japanese robots from Mars kissing Santa Claus underneath the nuclear-powered hair dryer with the defective wiring that turned the werewolf into the swamp thing.

Ethical dilemmas? who the hell cares, as long as it sells newspapers.

We are one step away from pre-programmed socialist mutant giant zombie dogs kissing escaped robot monkey doctors worldwide.