Extra sharp? Guess again

Get the straight facts!

Started? Hell, it's well on its way

Those were the days

Your recent order is our command

Yextry! Yextry!

Any given prime time

Pure as the driven snow

You folks at home can play along

Mt. Rush 'n More

De-revisionist history

Nightstand reading

Ask about our President's Day specials

News youse can probably do without

True to its enduring principles, if that's what you wanna call 'em

Extended forecast

Desperation Funnies

I say, I say, pay attention, boy, you might learn something

Our wax is shellacked front & back

Your order is already halfway there

Sponsored condiments

Dancing with myself

Set your TiVo to "monotony"

Don't worry about that...worry about this!

Your lips move but I can't hear what you're saying

The discombobulating process

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