Reader feedbag

Interested readers ask, "What the hell?" or, with resignation admit, "I'm a little behind on the Beagle" as if they have missed something and owe it to the readership. This is called opinion data collected through stand up or sometimes sit down interviews. You would probably call them casual, sporatic conversations.

It has been widely reported that little has been seen or heard of the brash, linguistically entangled, yapping of the Beagletorials and the harrumphed up opinionations of the Beagletolerables or Beagleterribles. Perhaps some among us have not heard the election is over (although a usually reliable source says that Sarah Palin has already thrown her beauty crown into the ring).

Yappers have to talk about something, and every media commentator wakes up every morning with an toggle switch that reads "Obama's moving too fast" or "Obama's moving too slowly," and throw themselves into a lather accordingly. The Beagle doesn't care to draw any conclusions after 10 days.

Shoot this out to Unfettered Hamity and Fresh Slice Billy O'Really

Click your heels three times

Alert readers have seen the identical phrase peppered liberally in the commentary pages of the Washed Times, from which the facts could not be further.

... a variety of independent post-election studies of Florida votes show George Bush beat Al Gore no matter how the count was conducted or interpreted.

Move over, David Lean

Video shooting script

They said it'd be a cold day in hell when a Black man became President of the United States

...and sure enough.

Inaugural argument

"Man, I bet you've never seen Beyonce sing wrapped up in as much clothes as she was at the Lincoln Memorial."
"Oh, you're disappointed? You think she should be out there shaking it half dressed when it's five degrees."
"No, honey, it was great. It's her voice I'm really interested in."
(long cold pause)
"No, really, baby, you gotta understand. Michelle, please, sweetheart...Eh, Bono, come over here and say hullo to Michelle. Baby? Hey look, it's Bono..."

Save yerself the cover price

NewsweekWarshPostcorp asks the tantalizing question, "To what extent will Barack Obama ask himself, 'What would Dick Cheney do?'."

Apparently, regarding issues of national security and executive power, he will have to deal in some gray areas. But it doesn't suggest he would continue the Butch era tradition of signing every law, "P.S. this doesn't apply to anything the president or vice president do or ask to be done."

Ask Dr. Hin?

Q: Some are wondering where the hell you been? And don't give us any of that relativity of time schtuff again?

A: It's Heisenberg on steroids, y'know? You can't say where it is but you can tell where it's gone.

Q: That's exactly what I'm saying? I'm saying, don't give us that schtuff?

A: Understood.

Q: Any 2009 predictions?

A: It will be a year of enormous...let's just say, when you think you've seen it all...

Frothing at the mouth is one sign of rabies

Social conservatives are rallying against Thomas Perrelli, Obama's nominee for associate attorney general because of his role representing Michael Schiavo in the Terry Schiavo case. According to one commentator, he is personally responsible for "having the Florida woman's feeding tube forcibly removed," presumably in accordance with normal hospital procedures and not jerked out by the callous hand of a activist judiciary. Jeffrey Kuhner of the Washed Times calls this "an act of coldblooded murder," in accordance with normal hospital operating procedures and the rule of law.

Kuhner is worried that Obama is showing his "radicalism on social issues" by "staffing his administration with hard-core liberals bent on promoting a pro-abortion, pro-gay rights, pro-euthanasia agenda," such as "fiercely partisan pro-choice Democrat, Tom Daschle," and "Sen. Hillary Clinton, a pro-abortion feminist, who will use the power of the State Department to promote a secular humanist agenda abroad."

Reader feedbag

A regular subscriber from Eastern Tennessee still holds a grudge against Gary Busey for stealing his girlfriend back in junior college where Gary was a notable footballer and married the woman in question but that is all history now.

A director of everything from the hills of eastern Kansas suggests the Beagle stretch its kultral coverage to include more esoterica such as music appreciation. The good people at Caiman recently sent American Primitive II from Revenant records featuring one-off recordings 0f blues and et cetera. Check.

An envrionmental militant keeps trying to lure some of the Beagletorials to the Federal bar or something like it, maybe Felix's, is that still there? Or the Post Pub, the Beagles are so predictable.

With giddy delight, we announce two new Democratic activists in Brooklyn join the Beaglefold, although it will be a couple-a years before they can read for themselves.

In latest government reportage

Difficult language intertwines up to the minute reportings of the Glorious Kiboshing of the Tamil Tigers for advance interests of domestic arrangements in Sri Lanka.

and from an earlier post...

According to the latest information bad weather condition are now favourable. But few minutes ago METROLOGICAL Department said possible cyclone to East.

Make it your policy

Struggle for the soul of the Party

In gentlemen's clubs and Holiday Inn conference rooms, in parish halls and cherrywood paneled conservatories, the hard right and the ultra right scrap over who screwed up worse.

A Jebhouse in the making?

GHWButch said he was for Jeb before he was against him, then he explainiated what people say up Kennebunkport and demonstratulated the conflogulated syntax that of some of us would have of had enough by now.

"The fact that everything that's a problem in this country should be put on his shoulders, that's not fair,'' Mr Bush whined. "He ran a clean operation, having kept this country strong and free after unprecedented in history attack, 9/11, and he'll have a lot to be proud of."

Mount Bushmore

Congrats Al!

The Minnesota State Canvassing Board certified Al Franken as the winner in the Minnesota Senate election, trouncing Norm Coleman by like 225 votes. Why just last week, all the Foxcasters were saying Franken should just give it up. The Beaglehood will wait for the Foxcasters to tell Norm it's all over and throw in the towel or hell to freeze over, whichever comes first. What kind of political future is in store for Tom Davis?

The Beagletorials are also hoping that someone less tainted that the Extortionist in Chief will also appoint Roland Burris and get it over with.

Hmm, was it that or the whole 'with us or against us' attitude the Administration took since the first day?

I do think the Florida recount set kind of an ugly mood amongst some in the electorate. In other words, the election was -- in their minds, was in doubt. That made it harder to come as a -- to unify the country after the election. -- President Wah? Bush

Again, don't give the GOSPers any bright ideas

On 23 December 2008 it was announced that President Lansana Conté of Guinea (you might say French Guinea) had died. Aboubacar Somparé, as President of the National Assembly, was Conté's constitutional successor, and the military proudly stood by him as he announced that he would call on the Supreme Court to name him president. Six hours later, that same group of military officers held another news conference to announce, "What Constitution?" and set up the National Council for Democracy and Development headed by by Capt. Moussa Dadis Camara (how is in that in Africa you don't have to be a general to take over the government?).

So, there, it seems like President-elect Obama was pretty smart to keep Robert Gates on. Unless some Army captain at Ft. Hood or something pops up and declares the election and consistitution an obstacle to "democracy and development."

RIP or RIH? you decide

Had there been no Paul Weyrich, there would be no conservative movement as we know it. -- James Dobson

Some readers ask

Shouldn't there be some kind of list of resolutions or what was best about 2008 or best movies or cultural events or some readers ask what ever happened to Kultral Notes? and Is Dr. Hin? okay? and these questions like the wind blow.

Resolutions include:

Authentic Beagletown chill gear.
More frequent and more coherent posts.
Animations and mixed metaphors until the cows won't have it.
Dr. Hin every week, whatever chemical combinations intervene